Not Alone in the Dark
by Batya
Summary: Post CoE. What happens when Jack dies? Where does he go? And who does he see? Rated T for death scenes and such. Janto


**A/N:I am fairly certain this idea isn't mine. I think I read it somewhere but I forget where. Just know I didn't come up with the premise. Btw this dialogue is straight off of Netlifx subtitles.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and bla**

"_I can survive anything but you can't!" there's desperation and grabbed shoulders _

"_Too late. I've already breathed the air" Acceptance on one side.  
>"There's gotta be something. There's gotta be an antidote." Denial on the other.<em>

You said you would fight _the voice echoes_

"_Then I take it back alright? I take it all back. But not him!" a voice cracks. Blue eyes made of water. Brown eyes go wide and begin to dull. The poison is taking him and his legs give way._

_He is caught by old arms and that familiar smell that feels like home._

"_No! no, no, no, no. No. No. Ianto no." the voice stops coming but the lips still say it. Brown eyes just stare up at him. So sad._

"_It's all my fault" the voice usually so deep and musical is broken. The strings are cut._

"_No it's not" the response is labored_

"_Don't speak, save your breath." Both know it's useless now. A cheek is stroked even as it goes a little gray. A face twists as its life is melting away._

"_I love you" a quick head shake._

"_Don't" this response will lead to endless regrets. But even as brown eyes show sadness, lids grow heavy._

"_Ianto. Ianto! No. No don't please. Ianto stay with me please". Words repeating like an endless symphony._

"_Stay with me! Stay with me please. Please." Everything is breaking down. The final seconds tick away_

"_Hey…it was good yeah" A weight bearing down on his chest. Breathing is difficult._

"_Yeah"_

_Then a final plea._

"_Don't forget me"_

"_Never could."_

"_A thousand years time, you won't remember" _

"_Yes I will" Absolute certainty_

"_I promise. I will." Arms tighten as the body in them starts to go slack. The final breaths leave his body._

"_Ianto. Ianto? Don't leave me please"_

Things had a tendency to go in circles. The starts were unpredictable the middles were unpleasant but the end…the end was always the same. And then it would start again.

The beginning could be him being stabbed, blood being ripped from his body. Or being shot or drowned. Cut, chopped, strangled, poisoned. He could get his neck broken or his head crushed.

The middle was certainly unpleasant. It could be moments, minutes, or hours. It was the moment after the death blow when he sat and felt the pain. At this point it was like greeting an old friend. The one constant in his life was this. After everybody he cared about was dead and the world had ended he could be left floating in space choking to death over and over again…

But the pain would always be there.

Then came the realization. He was dying again. He felt differently about this part over the years. At first he greeted the knowledge with fear, then came acceptance. There came a time when he was rather flippant about it. It had become old hat. For a time he had been ashamed of it. He knew people would see him as a freak when his heart began to beat again and he found it embarrassing. For a long time he was bitter knowing he would have to feel this pain again some day.

But the third part had been the same. The black. It was only after him that things changed.

The first time.

He had been stabbed in an alley. He bled out quickly and found he didn't give a damn when he realized he was dying again.

But when the black came it was different. Somebody was there.

"Hello Jack" the words came with that familiar Welsh lilt he had longed to hear for months.

"Ianto? Why are you here?"

"Because I want to be…My this time it was messy. I hope you find somebody to clean your coat properly when you wake up" his tone was light. Jack almost laughed but found it stuck in his throat. He could just make out where Ianto stood in the darkness.

"Why Ianto?"

"Because—"

He opened his eyes to find himself back in the alley feeling sticky from his own dried blood. He thought he might have dreamed something this time but he wasn't sure.

The second time

A weevil had scaly hands on his throat and Gwen wasn't here to help him now. As his vision began to grey and his hands seemed to go numb he knew it was coming again.

Black. Eyes adjusting.

"Good to see you again Jack." Jack looked up and saw the figure. He walked towards him.

"Can we do more than talk?" He asked. A soft chuckle.

"If you like." Jack was almost close enough to touch him.

"But you have to be quick, you regenerate fast."

"You know how fast I can be" Jack replied. Another chuckle.

"You still haven't answered my question…why stay here?"

Black slid away to replaced by a Cardiff night sky. The weevil had left him for dead. He had a dream again.

The third time.

He had outrun the bomb but he couldn't outrun the fire. The doors were sealed and he was forced to feel his skin blister and boil until his heart burst.

Ianto was still waiting for him in the dark. He could finally see his face. He still remembered every line.

Blue eyes welled up as he grabbed the younger man. Ianto grabbed him back and Jack realized he couldn't really feel it. It was like hugging an icy gust of wind. Letting go immediately, he backed away.

"You're not really Ianto! Get me out of here!" Ianto didn't fight him. Hands up in surrender and he backed away. His eyes are made of too many emotions to name

"I am Ianto but I'm dead. I no longer have a body." Jack stared at him, mouth open.

"Then why stay here?" those hands that he used to hold dropped out of the air and found their way into coat pockets.

"Because I want to"

"Why?"

"Because I know this part is hard for you and…You asked me not to leave"

He felt the cold first. A chilly breeze blew ash all over her his naked body. Normally he might have found the situation slightly comical but the dream he had sat on his mind and heart and he couldn't say why.

The fourth time

Dismemberment was a horrific way to go. Feeling parts of his body being cut away. There was lots of pain and screaming. Lots of blood. Eventually he would bleed out and they would leave him in a pile. Thank god unconsciousness came first

There he stood again. Clothed in darkness.

"So you stay here for me? What about when I'm not here?" He asked the moment he saw him. Ianto smiled.

"I'm not here all the time. I have ways of knowing when to come. And I don't want you to be alone anymore."

"But I am alone" Ianto looked almost hurt but pressed on

"Except when you're here. Then I can be here for you. I know it will be a long time but one day you will stay here and I will still be here for you. Then we can go on together." Again Jack could only gape. Ianto shrugged

"I see no point in beating around the bush considering your time limit"

Even as he spoke, Ianto was fading again. Before he was gone he called out

"And get a new coat that one's beyond saving"

When Jack opened his eyes he only remembered what happened before. But for some reason he was a little happy. At a later date he would say casually to Gwen 'it was just a dismemberment no big deal' like it was a big joke. Another Jack Harkness tale.

He couldn't possibly begin to explain it to himself or anybody else but right now half naked in a pile of garbage he was happy.

There were many more times after that. Jack got used to the icy wind feeling. Sometimes Ianto didn't say anything and just held him and then apologized for the cold. Sometimes they talked about absolutely nothing. Sometimes they joked and reminisced about their past. But no matter what he was always there. By the time Jack was finally there to stay he had been waiting a long time. He stood there patiently with a smile on his face. Jack in his own body approached him slowly. An old tired soul met a young patient one. He really had waited such a long time.

But it didn't matter as two spirits came together and could finally hold each other again.

**How typical. I can't even write Torchwood without trying to make it happier.**

**Also clearly I am a masochist. Had to go and rewatch that scene for the beginning. And then just kept watching. ARRRRRRRGH the feelings!**

** Please R&R I'm a whore for feedback**


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